So we are headed to the other side of the mountains for Easter again this year. In all honesty we were not going to. I sort of wanted to just lay low, have a kind of relaxed kind of thing. But then hubby mentioned he wanted to go see the new nephew anyways so we decided to go. I actually was not really even looking forward to it until recently because of certain person in my family that has been continously mean and rude, not only to me but about the adoption in general. I have been praying about what to do with this person. I love her, but right now I can't stand her. And here is what I believe God wants from me... Kindness and honesty. I have been honest with her before but it was via phone and I don't think that she HEARD. Or maybe she did and she just doesn't care. But her birthday is around the corner and I will give her a present and honest look into how she makes me feel and then let that be it. If I tell her what her harm is against me, I don't get the right to be mad about it anymore. It is her choice to keep doing it, or not. If she does, I know I have done what I can do and I can just pray for her and the situation I am in. I do pray she will get it though. And maybe she thinks I have harmed her. So I will be ready to listen to her.
Please pray that this goes well. This is not an easy thing. I really want to be done with this situation. Just steer clear of this person.
The Gang
- Momma L
- Let me tell you about our crew... Momma L- I dig pretty shoes- that are comfy. And coffee, I love coffee. Big Daddy- He is gonna cringe if he sees this, lol. I also dig that. He loves playing basketball with the kiddos. JD- He is 14. He is sarcastic. He is a freshman in HS. He is a regular teen. Annoyingdotcom. I heart that. HN- 9 yr old math wiz and future rap star. Well at least that is how he sees himself. He currently is enjoying beatboxing, reading, and anything techy. Little Miss- 8 years old, loves my little ponies and her critters. She loves all things pretty. HW- 7 years old and if it has to do with construction,garbage trucks, or wild life...he's there! He is my little funny man. Baby O- 4 years old and fancies herself fancy. She enjoys all things dolly, tea party, or shopping related.
Monday, March 25, 2013
A road not taken
It is late. 11:59pm to be precise. I don't know why I'm even still awake. I'm tired. I should be asleep. It has been a busy week with lessons, a visiting mother, and work. Yet, I'm awake. And here is why...I've had contact with the first mom, my cousin, at the advisement of our adoption SW I contacted her so we could try to come to an agreement. I was only able to talk with her one day, but I hope we can resolve things.
Updated: 3/25/13
As you can see I didn't get very far on that late night. I even had to make several corrections upon looking back I must have been dozing while typing haha. So here is what is currently happening, there has been a lot...
The communication with First Mom did not go as well as I had hoped. I suppose I dreamed up in my mind we would come to this wonderful agreement and that everything would be hunky-dorey. She would get her life on track and take care of the child in her care.
Here is what I know. She has many reservations about our family and does not trust any of us. This could be from many years of drug use and how it has effected her brain or it could be because she has kind of stunted maturity at the teen years, or a combo of everything. Maybe she is just sad and scared that things are finally coming to an end. I just don't know. I want to have contact with her. I want for there to be a good relationship between us. I want for her to be able to call and ask questions.
But at the same time she has to respect what we are doing here. We, as family- a new family- need time to get our bearings. Things are always changing. And they will change again for Little Miss after adoption is finalized. I just wish everyone would understand this and give her and us time. We aren't saying never to see First Mom, just let the dust settle a bit.
Updated: 3/25/13
As you can see I didn't get very far on that late night. I even had to make several corrections upon looking back I must have been dozing while typing haha. So here is what is currently happening, there has been a lot...
The communication with First Mom did not go as well as I had hoped. I suppose I dreamed up in my mind we would come to this wonderful agreement and that everything would be hunky-dorey. She would get her life on track and take care of the child in her care.
Here is what I know. She has many reservations about our family and does not trust any of us. This could be from many years of drug use and how it has effected her brain or it could be because she has kind of stunted maturity at the teen years, or a combo of everything. Maybe she is just sad and scared that things are finally coming to an end. I just don't know. I want to have contact with her. I want for there to be a good relationship between us. I want for her to be able to call and ask questions.
But at the same time she has to respect what we are doing here. We, as family- a new family- need time to get our bearings. Things are always changing. And they will change again for Little Miss after adoption is finalized. I just wish everyone would understand this and give her and us time. We aren't saying never to see First Mom, just let the dust settle a bit.
Friday, March 8, 2013
Sitting on a bus
Just sitting in a bus. Today is a busy day. My little sister is having her second baby boy, I'm rushing over. She is one week late. And at 2 pm we have a ftdm. With our favorite people.
Pray for today!
Thursday, February 28, 2013
Last day of February ...
Today is the last day of February. Little Miss has been with us six months and some change and my there sure are some differences. Great ones. Not to say that everything is peachy keen and we are all bonded together as one big happy family, but progress for sure. And to that I praise Jesus.
"You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do they light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a lamp stand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let you light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify you Father in heaven."
As husband and wife we have been driven to the verse many a time for many different reasons. From why we choose to keep our kids in public school to why chose to adopt, to even we chose domestic adoption. I am sure we will rest back upon it when one day we foster. God calls us to be a light, each of us have a different way that we shine but we are still to shine. If we hide our lights away, "protecting " them, how is that glorifying to our Heavenly Father? Hasn't He called us all to shine out loud for him? Not just quietly or comfortably in your church bubble where everyone knows you love Jesus. What about your neighbor, the school down the road, the kids playing outside. I suppose being in the schools allows me to see such a great need that most people can shut their eyes to. Ignore and pretend that they don't see. Some of these kids have homes, some are in foster care, some homes aren't super great. And they yearn for more. Rise up church. Take care of God's kids! Volunteer with a youth group at a local school see how you can get involved!
Soooo... I totally didn't plan on that paragraph above being in here, but maybe God has a plan for it. That is how He seems to work:)
Anyways, little miss is doing great. We have no word yet about when our adoption will be finalized. As always, hurry up and wait is the name of e game around here. We have one session left with our amazing counselor and then that will be done. Today the kids have violin lessons, and thus starts a busy spring!
One thing I want to note so I don't forget is how well Little Miss is doing with being redirected with her control/ bossiness. She has been known to like to control a room. Lol tell everyone exactly how to pickup and what to do, and well you can imagine that the boys only let that go on for so long before they told her " um.. You're not the boss of me." Haha. Well whenever any of our kids do this we tell em, " whose body are you in control of?" This didn't used to work with her as she would try to argue her way out of it. But now she is taking the cue and thinking and correcting on her own! I am so proud of her!!!
"You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do they light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a lamp stand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let you light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify you Father in heaven."
As husband and wife we have been driven to the verse many a time for many different reasons. From why we choose to keep our kids in public school to why chose to adopt, to even we chose domestic adoption. I am sure we will rest back upon it when one day we foster. God calls us to be a light, each of us have a different way that we shine but we are still to shine. If we hide our lights away, "protecting " them, how is that glorifying to our Heavenly Father? Hasn't He called us all to shine out loud for him? Not just quietly or comfortably in your church bubble where everyone knows you love Jesus. What about your neighbor, the school down the road, the kids playing outside. I suppose being in the schools allows me to see such a great need that most people can shut their eyes to. Ignore and pretend that they don't see. Some of these kids have homes, some are in foster care, some homes aren't super great. And they yearn for more. Rise up church. Take care of God's kids! Volunteer with a youth group at a local school see how you can get involved!
Soooo... I totally didn't plan on that paragraph above being in here, but maybe God has a plan for it. That is how He seems to work:)
Anyways, little miss is doing great. We have no word yet about when our adoption will be finalized. As always, hurry up and wait is the name of e game around here. We have one session left with our amazing counselor and then that will be done. Today the kids have violin lessons, and thus starts a busy spring!
One thing I want to note so I don't forget is how well Little Miss is doing with being redirected with her control/ bossiness. She has been known to like to control a room. Lol tell everyone exactly how to pickup and what to do, and well you can imagine that the boys only let that go on for so long before they told her " um.. You're not the boss of me." Haha. Well whenever any of our kids do this we tell em, " whose body are you in control of?" This didn't used to work with her as she would try to argue her way out of it. But now she is taking the cue and thinking and correcting on her own! I am so proud of her!!!
Big sister
I just love little miss' big sister. I have been thinking about her a ton lately. Wondering if she would have wanted to live here with us. But when all of this went down we all really though that this was the best for each child. They would each have their individual needs met. I suppose if one day she wants to come here she will let us know. For now I am happy to be there whenever she needs. I just love the sweet young lady :)
I pray she gets all her needs met and more Lord.
I pray she gets all her needs met and more Lord.
Tuesday, February 19, 2013
Reminded
While I am upset that certain members of my family keep being just plain mean, God is sweet to remind me of the verse he gave me on sat. He knew more trials were headed my way and that I need to count it all as joy. Joy, everlasting joy is the theme He is teaching is. Fall and call to Him.
So Lord, I give this situation to you. All of it. You know everything that is going on right now. It is Yours. Let your will be done.
My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind. For let not that man suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways. (James 1:2-8 NKJV)
So Lord, I give this situation to you. All of it. You know everything that is going on right now. It is Yours. Let your will be done.
My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind. For let not that man suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways. (James 1:2-8 NKJV)
Family feuds...
As previously mentioned I said it would be much easier to adopt someone who was a non family member than one who was. I stand by that conclusion. I have had nothing but a rude barrage of assaults from some family when this is supposed to be a happy time in my family. It makes want to not be around them! I keep turning the other cheek only to keep getting slapped.
I want people to remember that blood is not the end all be all of family! Blood is just a name. The people who we live with, who take care of us, that is our family. I am tired of people putting a higher placement on some kids over others. That is mean. Think of children who are adopted from overseas. Should we get all bent out of shape tht they are not having contact with their birth siblings? No their family is their family. That is that. Why do we place such high importance on blood in America. Blood is what orphaned them. Would I love to be getting together at family functions, yea sure.
Would I love to have some of the siblings to visit!
Without a doubt!
But ya know what makes me leery about family? Some of the people in it. People who can't get over themselves, and keep trying to make things hard for my little family. Just leave us alone already. Please. I won't subject my children to such vileness.
I want people to remember that blood is not the end all be all of family! Blood is just a name. The people who we live with, who take care of us, that is our family. I am tired of people putting a higher placement on some kids over others. That is mean. Think of children who are adopted from overseas. Should we get all bent out of shape tht they are not having contact with their birth siblings? No their family is their family. That is that. Why do we place such high importance on blood in America. Blood is what orphaned them. Would I love to be getting together at family functions, yea sure.
Would I love to have some of the siblings to visit!
Without a doubt!
But ya know what makes me leery about family? Some of the people in it. People who can't get over themselves, and keep trying to make things hard for my little family. Just leave us alone already. Please. I won't subject my children to such vileness.
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