In our hearts and on our minds...

Adoption has always been something I personally knew that I wanted in my life. I didn't know in what capacity. But even as a single person when I pictured my family I always pictured some kids that I had birthed ans some that were adopted, I just knew that I needed to marry a man who had the same idea. When Nash and I started talking marriage I remember talking about all of this with him. There was a time when I wasn't totally sure if I could have kids and so we did talk about adoption but I said even if we do have our own I still feel a pull into adoption and he was fine with that. Back then I just thought that we would adopt from China, I mean that is where people adopt from. Plus I have a cousin from there and so it seemed like the most logical thing to do. Well, a year or so into our marriage just out of sheer curiosity I took a look at the China requirments. We didn't meet the age ones or anything like that yet, but we also weren't looking to really adopt then I was just curious. Then there it was...NO EPILEPTICS. So let me get this straight, this country is throwing away their kids but because I have epilepsy I couldn't adopt one if I wanted too. Ya, I was really irritated. I have heard that little rule has been ammended to either they can or now they can if they adopt another epileptic or some other kind of "disability."
We then briefly looked at Ukraine as my wonderful bro-in-law is from there and wouldn't that be perfect...now mind you all, This "looking" is happening over a period of several years and two super cute bio kids. I read up on the country and there were somethings that just seemed a little crazy and not in a good way! After a discussion that seemed a no go too. Now over this period of time Nash and I keep seeing and hearing little things about foster care and foster/adopt. What is weird as I type this I can remember alot of the things that I saw or heard 2,3,4 years ago. I am also learning that sometimes things I think are weird might be God. I will be the first to admit that sometimes it is hard for me to tell is that God or is that just a quinkydink. But what I am learning is that if you keep hearing the same message over and over again, you keep seeing the same things over and over again, and this stuff happens when you are not thinking about it. That seems to be the big deal for me. He gets me when I am not expecting it.
Anyways I rambled there, I think I do that so if you are reading this...get used to it:)
Back to the weirdo foster adopt things I saw was actual signs and in odd spots, like driving down the road there was a sign on the side of the road saying if you want to foster adopt call this number. We were on a road trip and there was a huge sign hanging from inside the burger king. I remember that one specifically cause I thought what a weird thing to put in a burger king, dorks. I would hear ads on the radio. Then one day in my Indian news letter there was this little article about how there are all these Native kids in foster care and not one registered tribal member from our tribe. That is when Nash and I started talking about things and when I got pregnant, with my daughter.