sunny days

So my Mom has been here the past two weeks basically, and it has been a blast. I would say that I have been enjoying restful lazy days, and in some ways that is true. We have had our fair share of afternoons by the pool with the kiddos, but I have also been totally taking advantage of her being here by getting loads of junk around the house. My house is really in great shape now. All that is left is the girls room... yes girls. Ya sure I know nothing is final yet, but whether it is little miss S that joins us or another girl it will be a girls room at some point:) So now all I have is just to keep up on the day to day stuff. WHich don't get me wrong is no small thing. But I am glad for it. I sometimes wonder if my Mom thinks I have bit off more than I can chew. lol. I think we are just cut from different molds. She likes things a little less busy, I love lots going on all at the same time. I thrive on being busy.
I think though what I have learned in times of high stress, such as when my Aunt died is that there somes a point when instead of not talking, or feeling like I need to hold things in for the benefit of others, to talk to someone. My way of  coping through that was to control what I could, how much I worked out, which at that moment was a little too much. Though one would think with all of that working out I would have at least slimmed down a little more, I mean..sheesh!! But anyways... learning, always learning.
I am ready to get back to the way things were, my family routines. I am slightly annoyed that things have to be altered until dec. I am annoyed that I have to inconvience others for rides until then. But if I want to go to the gym, I am stuck, I have to. At least while it is still hot out. But what can ya do? Just wait...
So while mom was here, we have worked out, taken the kids to a movie, cleaned this house like 2 crazy cleaning fairies, enjoyed some pool days, it has been a super blast! I can't wait until they are back in the state again. Right now the boys are over at Tracie's house probably trying to whoop their granny's booties. Good times right there...good times.

A morning "quiet" time

So it is Monday morning, I sit out here with Liv on her potty, my glorious cup of joe, trusty bible, and The Fresh Beat Band. That is how a quiet time roles in my house. Nash is still asleep, well he was, actually now as I am typing this he has just woken up and is coming out grabbing his coffee and says "are you blogging." haha But previously it was just us girls. Not a totally typical morning as I have the carpet rolled up because I am desperately trying to get this cute two year old to pee in her potty:/

It seems like this journey we are on is, well just that, a journey. Ever changing, every developing, ups and downs. We have known that there would be court cases coming up but just didn't know when, we just learned that the first one is soon. I am excited and nervous all at the same time. As I was praying this morning I just asked God please, let Your will be done in all of this. We are just here to serve, whatever the outcome, we are willing. In the morning Nash and I usually read together, we are reading from James right now, but since I was on my own I just opened to wherever I had my marker in last, because I am lazy ok. I didn't feel like going to get my phone from the bedroom which has my indivdual study on it and so I just opened up, come on ya know ya do it to sometimes, it is fun a mystery ya don't know what you will get:) Well here is what I got.
Isaiah 41
In this chapter there are two uses of a courtroom scene to make a point. They are both used when talking about false gods and also about The rising up of Cyrus as ruler, my point was that I just found it interesting that there were TWO courtroom scenes in the one chapter I read this morning. And then there was the bit that stuck with me which I will share with you all now...

"I have chosen you and have not cast you away:

Fear not, for I with you.

Be not dismayed, for I am your God.

I will strenthen you,

Yes I will help you,

I will uphold you with My righteous right hand."

Isaiah 41: 10

So there ya go, this is what I have to believe. A child was chosen. Not cast away, we were chosen for her.

Makin a list and checkin it twice...

So I have this huge OCD list of everything that I want to do around the house and everything the state wants me to do around the house and I am like 2 rooms away from being done. And I am doing all of this while trying to potty train Baby O. It's ok, you can say it, I am super mom. No I am super-timed Mom. I am doing it all while MY MOMMY is in town and she is helping, oh how I heart her. She is giving me warm fuzzies this week.  But it feels good to not only have the house back in order, after my seizure things got kinda crazy around here, but even in tip top order!!

Now on to other news... we have a visit date set. And we are so excited!! It is a few weeks away, but I am a little glad about that because that will give us time to get the room in order and all that kind of stuff. Plus, I know that waiting is all apart of the process. wait. wait wait.
There has been a song stuck in my head lately...
While I'm waiting I will serve You
While I'm waiting I will worship
While I'm waiting I will not faint
I'll be running the race even while I wait....

little bit by little bit.

As I am sitting here right now I have a sweet four, almost five year old, cozied up next me, and I wonder how exactly does one start a blog entry. Really? I mean this is kind of a journal, a journey, a family snipet of sorts. So how do you start each little bit? I have no idea. And what exactly is too much to put out in here. I guess since I control who sees this I can put what I want, but at the same time this is the online community so I do feel the need to be somewhat reserved. At least for now.

Ok, now for the updates...
Our first visit with Little Miss was great. I know I didn't do much blogging that week at all, but if you are friends with me on FB you saw several pics so quit whining! I do know that this was percieved as merely a vacation and therefore we recieved what was probably "vacation" behavior maybe, but maybe not.  God knows what He is doing here in our lives and we are just along for the ride. We have already come so far from where I imagined we would be. God's hands are amazing.

We are now working for a second visit, and we are so excited. We are feverishly working away on things here at home. It seems like the checklist that we have is breeding or something. I swear I check one thing off and two more appear! So even though it seems like here visit is far off, it is actually a blessing a little bit because we will be able to get all of our household checklist done. Then we just have to wait for inspection! That is how it is I have noticed. Hurry up and wait, hurry up and wait...and wait, and wait. And when you hate waiting, it really stinks.

Reading peeps, there aren't many of you as I am keeping this very private right now, I ask this of you..
Please pray for speediness in the areas of paperwork, and all the behind the scenes stuff.
I ask you to pray for her heart and ours, that God will do His perfect will with our entire family.
And finally I ask you to pray for a smooth transition.

Full of nuggets

I started this post a few days ago and I finish it while watching the kids our by the pool.... James was full of glorious little nuggets that morning. While I was sitting and planning to enjoy my coffee there were other little wonderful things gifted to us.

"But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man observing his natural face in a mirror; for he observes himself, goes away, and immediately forgets what kind of man he was." James 1:22-24 How often do we hear only but not act when we are called to? Are we given several chances to be a doer? I guess I kind of think so. I mean we didn't go right out at the first sign of adoption and adopt the first kid in sight. I think for some people it is more of a journey. Is this what God has really called us to do? Then acting on it. ...and then there was this.... James 1:27 NKJV 27 Pure and undefiled religion before God and the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their trouble, and to keep oneself unspotted from the world. I think it speaks for itself.

"But let PATIENCE have its perfect work..." James 1:4

If you know me- at all- you know I am very patient in some areas and not patient in others. Gimme a room full of children, I am flippin' Mother Theresa...ok too far-ish. You all so know I am dripping with sarcasm, hiiii:) Anywho, ask me to wait for something, it just kills me. I have a million and one questions. Why, who, what, where, how long, how come , the possibilites are endless!!!!
I have had times in my life where I have had waiting trials before, where it was clear I was to wait for one reason or another. Or maybe the whole point of what was going on was to make me wait, to teach me more on patience. You would think I would have gotten the message...message.not.recieved.

"My bretheren, count in all as joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience."

I would say I am experiencing a trial, and one that is bound to teach me patience. Have you ever had someone tell you that you can't drive for 6 mo? Welcome to my world. When I had the seizure last month I knew it would happen. I had a feeling after it happened that even though there was no aura, that I could pinpoint, no more Harley (my dog) to start acting weird when my body gets off, I already knew what caused it. I was right. As I sat in my neuro appt. my dr. asked if there had been any added stress lately, I nodded saying I recently lost my Aunt. I may bottled up my emotions concerning that. She then asked if I had been getting enough rest, and something about excercise I think. Which was when the hubs pipes us with "yea she was getting like hardly any sleep and getting up to work out at like 5 am. Basically everything I had thought contributed, did. Now what I am learning from all of this, well it seems to be a forced lesson in slowing down. Especially since I can't drive.
Am I sad about not driving, I think I was frusterated last night, annoyed is more like it. But you know the song... I fought the law and the law won. Well I am not going to do that lol. Too much is at risk, and besides, doesn't He know what is better than Me? If He wants me home right now, and taking things easy, then maybe there is something really awesome on my homefront? And if not, I am saving some major gas money!!

FB vs a Blog

So yes I am on FB but you have seen nothing of this on there, why is that?
Well, I am feeling cautious. I know nothing of how this works, I know nothing of what I can say or not say according to the state, I really don't know what to do from here except continue with our licensing process. But what I do know is that I need an outlet for thoughts, for everthing that is going on in my head. I don't think that I will say anything on FB, too public and what if this doesn't work out?
I ask any of you who read or follow to please keep all questions and comments to the blog.... at least for now:)

The Road Unknown

There are so many questions swarming in my mind about the road we will travel, the when's, the why's, the how's. Those questions spawn other questions. And when I let my mind wander it will just spin around and around. I have to just get back to where I know is the right path, the one God is leading. I just need to remember that all things will work out for His glory, no matter what the situation.

A Prayer Answered...

"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." Phil 4:6

I can say that we have been praying, daily for the daughter that is out there somewhere born already, or maybe about to be born, maybe even about to be created! We have prayed for her health, for a blanket of protection in whatever circumstances she is in. What we thought was going happen was one day we would recieve a call to go and pick up a child and maybe that child would end up being our daughter, what has started to unfold is much better. God knows the end from the begining and HIS plans are far greater. So what  has His plan been looking like for us this past month and why have you not been hearing anything else about our adoption journey???!!!
Well it is the same reason I switched the blog to private....

As it turns out God did not have an unknown child waiting for us, but someone that we already knew. A family member, and while this poses a whole host of different challenges understanding family and new roles, we are so very thankful that God chose US!!
This beautiful child was born to a family member I would consider a best childhood friend. One you could always pick up with right where you left off. Unfortunately, things in her life did not go so well. In a perfect world we would be sitting on the beach with the family watching our children play together, laughing and catching up. That is not ever going to happen. What is happening is that OUR family has been called to adopt, and this lovely little girl is on her way to becoming "available." We too are "available."

We feel like she is the answer to what we have been praying for. I admit sometimes when I look at her it makes me a little sad, I miss her mother. She is so cute and she looks a lot like her mother. I wonder if she will call us momma and daddy eventually. But for now she is just enjoying a vacation with her family....

Lazy lunches are fun

I do value eating around the table, don't get me wrong, we did it this morning for breakfast. But sometimes lazy lunches are fun.  Eating, giggling at a funny show, it is music to my soul.

Are all those kids yours?!? Exclaimed the candy lady.

As usual we packed up and headed into town to get the kids candy and a special thing before leaving. We always get them a shirt or something like that and this year we found these really cute jackets, they will be perfect for the fall or chilly nights.
While checking out the lady looks at everyone then at me and says..."are all these kids yours?"
I've noticed that three is an acceptable number to have, but once you blow past that you are weird. Like why would you want so many kids? oh, I don't know why do you want so many dogs, cats, shoes, brand name purses you never use, and useless opinions you like to share? Hmmm I guess that stuff gets irritating huh? Oh well, lucky for me and my family we choose to do what God calls us to do, not what others think is acceptable:)

On our way to the beach

It's that time again...the 4th of July beach vacation at the WA coast. except this year we are going after the 4th. This year on the way down we have quite a car full! Maxed out really. Henry, Jules, and Hudson in the far back. Liv and Cody in the front. We decided to not take the dog this year...to much going on.  We will still have a full car on the way home because we are bringing Serenity home for a week:)
I am so ready for a beach break! Is it as relaxing as when you have no kids...no, but I find different things relaxing now. Watching the kids play in the sand. Chatting with the family, playing games, seeing the men be goofy. I love it all.
I think Uncle Cody is probably ready to be out of the long car ride, but it does him some good. After all, despite what teenagers think, the world does not revolve around their cute faces:)
Ohemgee, just took the pics notice my brother...oh my.

Philippians 4:13

I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. Let's just think about that sentence for one second and how profound that is. I can do ALL things, and trust me folks, right now there is a lot of "things" going on in my life. But God promises that I can do all of it through Him. That is amazing. Amazing. Can I handle everything all on my own, um no. Would I want to, ya, no. But with my God, He can handle it and He promises He will. I am counting on God's strength for me to help with a setback concerning my epilepsy. I believe that He has plans for our lives, do I love the fact that I had a seizure, knocked my head on the counter and got a concussion. Ya, I don't think so. But do I think that God can be glorified through my situation, sure. I am counting on God's strength for my family and for my brother specifically. I love that boy and he needs to wisen up. I believe that God has a plan for us and that He is giving us the strength that we need to get His plan done on a daily basis. I am looking forward to every day that God has for us and our family, and I love to be in His will. I know that He is going to bring us the right little girl. I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength... and people I have needed a ton, a TON of strength in the past 2 months. I am amazed daily about what God continues to do in my family, in my marriage, and in my life. Amazed.

Dear Edmonds, WA

So I can see in the ticker feed who visits the blog and while there are a whopping 4 people following, baahahaha I keep seeing Edmonds, WA pop up there so my curiousity has got me...who are you Mrs. or Mr. Edmonds comma WA? I'm not running a hot blog or anything it is really just like a family journal, writing down the funny stuff kids do, and now it will appear to be our adoption journey as well! So let's see who you are? Sincerely, Momma L